the qcows have an episode... with CHEMISTRY!
2003-11-30 9:49 p.m.

Well it's just that time of year again when us qcows decide to think up something funny for all you deprived fans out there. Oh yes, our great minds have once again come together to create a piece of genius that awed even us.

Okay so it didn't awe Cow #1, but me being the simpler of us beasts, I was utterly amazed.

But yes, tonight our inspiration was science. It all began when poor, dear Cow #1 had to make with the balancing and the equations and the *goes off into Professor Frink gibberish*.

Cow #1 says:

hey... do you know how to do skeletal equations and all that shit?

Cow #2 says:

what the hell is a skeletal equation? like, can you give me an example? coz i might know it as something else

Cow #1says:

lmao umm... like oxygen + hydrogen = water

(that's not even true)

i think that's what it is, anyway

Cow #2 says:

LMAO

Cow #2 says:

okay there's like 957 thousand different kind of equations in chemistry that that could be...

Cow #1 says:

lmao ok hold on i'm trying to find the sheet we got on it

Cow #1 says:

wait sorry

Cow #1 says:

skeletal equation is like H2(pretend that's little) + 02 = H20

Cow #2 says:

haHA i do know that shit

Cow #1 says:

whoo! then you can help me

Cow #2 says:

at least, i think i do

Cow #2 says:

yes i can

Cow #1 says:

ok, can you tell me how i write the skeletal equation for the incomplete combustion of acetylene gas?

Cow #2 says:

well combustion is always something plus O2

Cow #2says:

does it give you the formula for acetylene?

Cow #1 says:

i don't think so

Cow #2 says:

well god damnit. i'll look it up in my chemistry book then LMAO

Cow #1 says:

but i know that you make it by inverting a test tube of water in a beaker of water, then putting a piece of calcium carbide in the water, then place the tube over the piece and let it fill up with the acetylene

Cow #2 says:

[crackhead smiley]

Cow #1 says:

sorry... sciencey words are all stuck in my brain LOL

Cow #2 says:

lmao it's okay

Cow #2 says:

acetylene is a hydrocarbon, yaw?

Cow #2 says:

*prays to cod it is*

Cow #1 says:

er, sure

Cow #1 says:

ehehe, cod

Cow #2 says:

LMAO okay well i'm going to assume it is, since my book is talking about it in a section about hydrocarbons

Cow #2 says:

i got that from mma lmao

Cow #2 says:

okay acetylene is c2h2

Cow #2 says:

well. i know the COMPLETE combustion is c2h2 + o2 = h2o + co2

Cow #2 says:

you know, that might be it. because that's not balanced.

Cow #1 says:

whoo... you = life saver

Cow #1 says:

yeah, i have to balance it in the next question

Cow #2 says:

HA i can balance it!

Cow #2 says:

*feels special* i am good at something

Cow #1 says:

i can too... it is honestly the ONLY thing i know how to do in chemistry

Cow #2 says:

i know how to convert between shit

Cow #2 says:

like, between units

Cow #2 says:

but going from like, grams to liters? i'm like wutthefuckyoutalkinbout?

Cow #1 says:

lmao oh, i know

Cow #1 says:

same here

Cow #2 says:

also. i can write empirical and molecular formulas, and name compounds

Cow #1 says:

zuh??

Cow #2 says:

AND i can figure out the molarity of something *feels so god damn special*

Cow #2 says:

lmao don't worry about it, it's not important unless you have to do it

Cow #1 says:

*face contorts with confusion*

Cow #2 says:

LMAO

Cow #2 says:

mine too. hence why i gave up on chemistry. we're in chapter 4 LMAO and i'm all "wut?"

Cow #1 says:

yep... that's me for pretty much every unit in science lmao

Cow #2 says:

lmao yep, me too

Cow #1 says:

i think the only thing i've actually known how to do was like all that heat capacity shit

Cow #2 says:

i still have stuff to turn in that was due the week after my birthday

Cow #1 says:

Q = mc(delta thingy)T and whatnot

Cow #1 says:

LMAO! good job

Cow #2 says:

*face also contorts with confusion*

Cow #1 says:

lmao

Cow #2 says:

me + science = explosion

Cow #1 says:

ROFLOL

Cow #2 says:

LMAO look cow #1, combustion!

Cow #2 says:

okay sorry LMAO

Cow #1 says:

it's the only science equation that ever made sense to us

And oh how I do agree. As you can see, us qcows are quite content to live on our little island of Unglo Punglo and drink lemonade out of coconuts and not know a damn thing about chemistry.

Now excuse me while I go drink salt water because I don't know how to purify it.

-Cow #2

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diaryland(once again)